family

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The "quiz" in the "Take a Step Forward" link. These are questions that appear to indicate "privilege". I would not have stepped far, but I answered the questions fairly and honestly. The memories they brought made me smile...although I am NOT privileged by their definition. (oh...and the questions are for "when you were in college" - which is now, so I just went back to my childhood...)

NOTE: As I look at some of these things that make a person "privileged", they enable a person to become isolated from family...your own room, a TV in your own room, a telephone in your own room...

The importance placed on "STUFF"...not one of these questions asked about "did your mom/dad/family LOVE you?" What privilege are we looking for? God's or man's?

(WAY MORE BELOW:) ...continue reading →

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Saturday, she was fine. Chased a moth even.

Sunday she sat on the stairs, hunched over and cried when I touched her.

This morning she was laying on her side in her bed over the heating register, crying when I pet her.

This afternoon she went to sleep.

Simone was about 16 years old and the most affectionate and cuddly cats I've owned. She was known (even among people who don't like cats) as "Sweet Simey". She consented to be worn as a hat by my son and stuffed into the front of his t-shirt. She slept with my daughter and Amanda doesn't remember life without her. Simey even liked little kids.

The trip to the vet was hard, but not as hard as seeing her hurt.

God created man in His image, we are the ones with souls. It is our job to take care of the earth and those that belong on this earth with us.
Animals don't fear death, they fear pain and Sweet Simey didn't deserve pain.

(The photo is from a time when she was fat, healthy, happy and very relaxed...)

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My Family’s (non)Traditions

Over the last five years I’ve decided that if a tradition isn’t working – pick a new one!

Thanksgiving and Christmas are the two holidays that my family “struggles” with traditions – meaning that in the past there has been a tension between what the tradition “should” be and what really works for us.

I’ve come to the conclusion that family traditions are extremely important – and you need to make your traditions yours. Adopting somebody else’s just isn’t the same.

The first year after my husband passed away, we decided that we really didn’t want to spend Christmas at home. Too many memories. So, we spent the holiday with my mom and dad in Florida. It was very nice (and warm). But it wasn’t home. It was my kids’ first Christmas “without Dad”, they didn’t need to escape – they needed Christmas at home. We have spent Christmas at home every year since – but it hasn’t looked the way that it did.

The next Thanksgiving (the second one without Dad) was the big change in tradition. For years, we had gone to my brother’s home for Thanksgiving Day and I planned on that again. Just a few days before the holiday, I called to find out what I could bring. After a couple of stalls, I was told that everybody was spending this Thanksgiving with their in-laws. Golly – that stung.

I felt totally alone – I didn’t have in-laws to spend the holiday with. So, I made an “executive decision” to just stay home. A dear friend put it this way: I could either decided to make do with what was left of my family – or we could go on because this is our family. The first Thanksgiving I did the whole big dinner thing – for 3 of us. Oh, there was so much food! And in the afternoon (NO football at my house) we rented movies and had a marathon. It was right before the third LOTR came out and I had not seen the first 2 – so on Thanksgiving Day we got me caught up.

Every year since, we have turned down invitations – Thanksgiving is a family time. Our family time. This year, we did spend it with my sister-in-laws. But the rule was – we had to have a movie marathon. It really works for us and (at this point) we have no intention of changing it.

This year, for Christmas, we don’t have a tree up yet (it’s in the basement, in a box). We all have final exams for college next week, I should be (at this moment) working on that research paper.

The new tradition is friends and fun. My kids have friends in families that don’t seem to “get it”. Last year, three teenagers left their families before noon on Christmas Day to come to our house. One of them had been removed from his home and placed with his sister. His birthday is Christmas Day – and they forgot. This boy turned 16 on Christmas Day and came to my house. He cried when I made a birthday cake.

Don’t get me wrong – glitz and ribbon and ornaments and stars and all that “stuff” is nice. This year I went to the mall for that.

It’s the people that should be the outstanding tradition.

Since I’ve been a widow, I’ve had lonely times around the holidays. Most single folks do.

But I’ve also seen that there are people – in my life, kids – that are a lot worse off.

Christmas this year? Church service in the morning, and then I expect some extra teenagers for movies, video games and frozen pizza.

It’s the people.

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Hi i just accepted my mommas invitation, nothing really to say right now, umm im 16 yrs old and early enrolled into community college, i just got my first job. Umm, i have my nose pierced, i think its cute, i asked to get my lip pieced but momma said no because she thinks it looks ugly, so i didnt do that, oh well. But anyways i was planning on going to sleep like an hour ago and never did so, umm, bye.

(Guest blogger, Amanda)