Naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac

I got sidetracked on a song meme...I was googling for lyrics and ran across this:

For the record:  This is NOT my theme song.

Twenty Naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac
Author: Chris Stuart, 1994
Album: Lonesome Town
Artist: Cornerstone
1995 Folk Era Productions

I was thumbin' my way down to Baton Rouge,
Standin' on the side of the road,
When a car pulled over and a voice cried out,
"We'll take you where you want to go."
I jumped inside, but to my surprise,
They were naked as a poor man's toes.
It was a tight situation when the whole congregation
Said the devil was in my clothes.

   Twenty naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac,
Brothers and sisters shoutin' in the back,
Elders in the front, choir in the trunk,
Twenty naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac.

The sermon that morning was on Adam and Eve
And the ways of the dreadful snake,
Everybody was clappin' when the preacher pointed at me,
My body began to shake.
I threw off my shirt, and my shoes and my socks,
My jeans and my BVDs.
We were all in the nude, shoutin' "halleloo!"
And singing "Sombody Touched Me."


We had the cruise control set to fifty-five,
When a Smokey got on our tail,
He pulled up beside, his eyes got wide,
And the siren began to wail.
We ran off the road toward the tree of life,
Lord, the future was looking bleak,
We hung on and prayed, everybody was saved,
'Cause we all knew how to turn the other cheek.

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3 thoughts on “Naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac

  1. Phil

    Top 10 Reasons for this post:
    *David Letterman drum roll please*

    10) Two words; sleep deprivation
    9) Carelessly storing your Human Anatomy book next to Charismaic Chaos gave you some ideas.
    8) Your meds need adjustment. Badly.
    7) This just proves to Amanda that she's no more normal than her mother.
    6) This is the first in a series of posts announcing your devotion to Bob "naked before the Lord" Evans.
    5) Somehow, this behavior among Pentecostals actually surprises you.
    4) Serves you right for Googling "total openness in the church"
    3) [You'd have to delete this comment if I made it, so I'll save you the trouble]
    2) Repressed fantasies from youth church trips really come back hard, eh?
    1) "Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaketh"

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