A friend and I have been discussing (on a regular basis) about interacting with culture (or separating from it), or the same situation in a church, etc.
One of the first times we talked about it was right after I read "A Radical Reformission" by Mark Driscoll. The exact situation we were discussing was a young woman who (whether she was or not) dressed "Goth". To be honest, right now, it's a toss up for me - to dress that way, she is identifying herself with a sub-culture that celebrates depression and darkness. But to be willing (as a Christian) to stay with that group, she may be able to reach them in a way that no other person could.
I have recently been through a bit of "stuff" with my old church (actually, for "technical reasons" my membership is still there for a very short while).
So you stay within and try to change things? Or leave and witness to the ones that you still have contact with?
I believe that it is different when you are in a church that you feel is not teaching what is right.
When you belong to a church, you don't just "go". You have a responsibility to that church. You donate time, money and resources. Maybe more importantly, you are committed to submitting to the leadership.
That's what ultimately made my decision. When I got to the point that I didn't want my money and resources going to the things that the church was giving money to, it was time for me to leave. More importantly, when the leadership is taking that church in a direction that I believe is wrong, it is wrong of me to stay, because I cannot submit to leadership I believe is wrong.
I saw a comment similar to that on another blog - that it is better to stay and witness, than to "jump the boat".
Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account.
Martin Luther is quoted as saying, "Unless therefore, I am convinced by the testimony of Scripture . . . I can and will not retract . . . Here I stand . . . I can do no other. So help me God, Amen!!!"
This man, caught between obeying the church leaders and the testimony of Scripture, refused to retract what his conscience told him was truth.
For me, caught between what the church is saying ("there, there, it's not a big deal") and what I know is Biblical, I refuse to "recant", I must follow conscience.
If I cannot cheerfully and joyfully submit to the leaders of a church, I should not be there.
In a couple of days, it will be Sunday...I'll tell the pastor of the church we're attending now that I have not received a reply to the letter to my old church, and I'll ask for my membership to be transferred.
For the sake of the leadership at my old church, it's the right thing to do.