Author Archives: MzEllen

• 18 Comments

•

(something to the effect of):  but if the head of the wife is the husband, then how can Christ be her head?  She'll have two bosses?!?!?  How can this be?

Who do you work for?

- My lead teacher is Terri

No...who do you work for?

- The principal of my school is Karen

NO!  Who do you work for?

- My school is overseen by the intermediate school district.

NO!!! WHO DO YOU WORK FOR?

- GRPS.

THANK YOU!!!

~~~~~~

Who is your head at church?

- my group leader is Laura.

No, who is your head at church?

- my pastor is Ken.

No, who is your head at church?

- the board consists of...

NO!   WHO IS YOUR HEAD AT CHURCH?

- Christ.

THANK YOU!!!

~~~~~~

Point being that having a group leader does not keep Christ from being "head", any more than having a lead teacher prevent GRPS from being my employer.

At the same time, my principal is an authority figure - with real authority - who also works for GRPS.

~~~~~~

Likewise, complementarians teach that the husband is the head of the wife; a wife is to submit to her husband as the church submits to Christ.

The husband is an authority figure - but they both "work" for Christ.

(This post is set for all comments to be moderated until I return from vacation...July...something...you can comment, it just needs to be approved.)

•

Leaders of the Presbyterian Church (USA) overturned a long-standing ban on the ordination of gays and lesbians Friday, providing yet the latest example of a religious denomination struggling with how, and whether, to incorporate homosexuality into church life.(...)

I feel proud of my church today," said Lisa Larges, national coordinator for That All May Freely Serve, an organization that advocates for gay equality in the Presbyterian church.

Larges, who lives in San Francisco and attended seminary there, has fought unsuccessfully for more than two decades to become a Presbyterian minister.

"I think a generational shift is what we are witnessing," she said Friday. "There is a whole generation coming of age for whom acceptance is a given. The church is beginning to experience that sea change."

No...no slippery slope at all...

And no generational shift, either.

•

This is sparked by a gender debate, but it became a philosophical question for me all on its own, with its own personal application.

There are three words (alphabetically):

  • authority
  • desire
  • will

Authority simply is the means by which to carry out desire or will (or both).

My question ended up being:  what is the difference between a "will" and a "desire"  (I will put "will" in quotes to distinguish which will I will be writing about:  My "will" will win over my desire for chocolate.)

A desire is that which I want.  Carnal urges.  Feeling of "need" for that which is not a "need".

"Will" is the resolve to follow a path, whether or not that path is that which I desire.

Within a church body (my own experience), the board has a "will" that decides the direction of a church.  A congregation member (me) also has a will that believes the church should be heading in a different direction.

The board "wills" that this particular church has no need for a singles ministry.  The congregation member's "will" (a belief that the church should have a singles ministry conflicts with the board's decision.  Who wins?  After examining self, the congregation members sees that the "will" to have a singles ministry is (in reality) a desire, not a need.  The board's "will" will carry the day.  And that's a good thing.

Another...

The same church board "wills" that a variety of speakers come into the church for special events - including Sunday morning service.  The same congregation member (me) "wills" that she be in a church where the speakers are in agreement with denominational beliefs.  After examining the speakers and topics, the congregation member discovers that roughly half of the speakers are anti-Trinitarian, Oneness Pentecostals and Kansas City Revival members.  Decides that this is not a mere "desire", said congregation member confronts church leaders.  Getting nowhere, brings the matter to a higher authority (denomination leadership).

The first example is a "desire" for a singles ministry, the second is a "resolve" to see Biblical teaching in the church.

Could this have been different?  Sure, it was tempting to push (against the board) for a singles ministry and it would have been easier to cave in on the speaker issue.

Both of these issue illustrate the "will" within a hierarchy (church government)
How to apply this to on a more personal level?

I can apply it to my health journey in two (and opposite) ways.

I have a desire (want) to be more healthy.  The question becomes, do I have the "will" (resolve) to do what I need to do in order to have that desire met?

In the negative...I have a desire for (want) chocolate.  Snickers to be precise.  The question becomes, do I have the "will" to put down the candy bar and eat in a more healthy way?

Both of these  illustrate a struggle within one's self.

Simply put, my "desire" conflicts with my "will".  That which I should do, vs. that which I want to do.

A "feeling of I-want-to-have-that" vs. a lasting resolve to make it happen.

Within a couple?

I believe that Scripture gives a pattern of male leadership within the church and home.

Desires?  Each member of the couple should put the desires of the other in front of their own.  Desires are like preferences - a desire for chocolate cake vs. strawberry.  Vanilla cone vs. a twist.  Blue carpet vs. green.

"Will"?  A lasting resolve for the direction?  That (in a complementarian vs. egalitarian world), is stickier.  In a godly marriage, both spouses will study together and the direction of the home will be supplied by Scripture.  There are times when this will conflict.  Baptist vs. Methodist.  Infant baptism vs. not.
Slightly bigger, but not insurmountable...Pentecostal vs. cessation.   Reformed vs. Arminian.

These (although with great understanding) I believe that a wife can safely submit to her husband as the church submits to Christ (with limits:  I would not follow a husband to a One-ness church or to an Exclusive Psalmsidy  church.)

Larger issues:

  • A spouse that converts to another religion - I would put this under the second illustration of the church board and me.
  • A husband who wishes the wife to fall into sin.  If there is a difference of opinion of "sin", call the pastor.
  • An abusive situation (no matter which spouse and no matter who is being abused).  There is never a reason for abuse and every excuse is a bad one.

Does the husband have the right to "impose" his "will".

The jury is out.  I tend to think "not" - for the following reasons.

  • to have to impose his "will" means the wife is not being submissive in the first place.  If he is not leading into sin, then the wife is in sin.  If he is leading into sin, then the wife has every right to oppose him.
  • Either way, the path is not open warfare...it is Matthew 18.  And counselors.
  • If the "will" is abuse.  No excuse.  Get out.  Now.  Don't wait.  Not for a ride, not for the kids to grow up, not for another day.

This will not solve any debate; it's about definitions...

(This post is not moderated, but the entire blog is set for all comments to be moderated until I am back from vacation.)

•

* Exported from MasterCook *

couscous banana pudding - 5 points, CORE

Amount  Measure       Ingredient -- Preparation Method
--------  ------------  --------------------------------
1                cup  skim milk
1/2                jello fat-free, sugar-free banana cream instant pudding mix (3 1/2 ounces) (info is for 1/4 of a package)
1             medium  banana
1         tablespoon  couscous -- whole grain

boil 2 Tbsp . water in a microwave safe container, add couscous and cover.  Meanwhile, mix the 1/2 package of pudding with the skim milk.  When the couscous has absorbed the water add to the pudding mix.

Slice the banana and layer pudding mix and banana slices in bowl or pretty glass.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Per Serving (excluding unknown items): 285 Calories; 1g Fat (3.3% calories from fat); 11g Protein; 60g Carbohydrate; 3g Dietary Fiber; 4mg Cholesterol; 748mg Sodium.  Exchanges: 1/2 Grain(Starch); 2 Fruit; 1 Non-Fat Milk.

NOTES : This WAS lunch.

Nutr. Assoc. : 0 0 0 0

•

Man injured after run-in with a bear.

literally.

Tim Egan, 53, was riding on Old Stage Road Tuesday afternoon when suddenly a bear appeared in front of him. Egan hit the bear and ended up skidding across the road.

"This bear looked at me with a look of terror on his face and sort of made a noise," said Egan. "I looked at him with a look of terror and we went, 'aaaahhhhh.'"

~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~

Jail visits lead to more time locked up

AUGUSTA -- As soon as an inmate from Vassalboro had a visitor at the Kennebec County jail in Augusta, he was violating a court order.

Marshall Crandall IV, of Vassalboro, was sentenced to serve nine months in jail Tuesday at a Kennebec County Superior Court hearing after he pleaded guilty to three counts of violating conditions of release for having contact with the visitor...the same woman who visited him at the jail.

The violations occurred April 5, 10 and 15, when the woman named as the assault victim visited Crandall, according to jail records.

The woman told the judge on Tuesday the domestic assault was mutual, and that she could have been charged with the same offense in the incident.

"I picked him up three or four times and slammed him on the ground," she said.

~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~

•

It's a frame of mind.  "Thin Within" doesn't refer to "losing weight".  They call it "releasing weight".  The thought being that if you "lose" something, you might find it again.  (And I HAVE found my lost weight again).

When you lose your keys, it means a lack of attention, carelessness.  The object of your search may be right under your nose, waiting for you to pick it up again.

When you "release" something, you let it go.

I'm thinking of those kids' movies where a baby wild thing is found by a family and raised to adulthood and released back into the wild, where it is supposed to be.   You don't expect (or want) those released animals to return to you.

When you "release" a brake, it's so the car can go.  Move forward.  Controlled, yes.  But no longer at a standstill because of what was holding it back.

Both of those thoughts about "release" can be applied to the health journey.

If I "release" my extra poundage into the wild blue yonder, it need to be with the expectation that they will not return to me.  I am purposefully behaving in a way that will send them away.  I am not searching for them.

I am also "releasing" my body from the extra weight.  I move better, feel better, act better.  I am no longer at a standstill because of the extra weight I carry around.

"Losing" weight is a diet, a burden.   It's work.

"Releasing" weight is freedom.  Will it require an effort?  Oh, yes!  But so does backpacking, hiking on a mountain, riding a bike...those are all "freedom" words to me.

From now on, I am not "losing weight"...I am "releasing" it.

• 8 Comments

•

Why do I believe "wives, submit to your husbands as unto the Lord..." and stop?  Because I'm reading my own mail.

My submission to my husband (when he was alive) did not depend on him loving me as the Christ loves the church.  Reading my own mail, I see my role.

Did I confront him?  Yes.  Did I enlist the help of the pastor?  Yes.  Did I pray?  Yes.

Did that stop me from submitting?  No.

God's Word to me is still God's Word, whether nor not somebody else obeys their Word.

I remember a great turning point in my Christian walk - the day I realized that my walk with God did not depend upon my husband's walk with God.

Could I follow his lead when he provided it?  Absolutely.  I can follow my pastor's lead, but my walk is still my responsibility.

Does being my own responsibility relieve me from submission?  Not at all, rather my submission is a part of my own responsibility.

Read my own mail.

That is why I seldom write about a man's part in a marriage.  It largely does not concern me - When I write "God-stuff", it is about what things are beginning to mean to me.  Yes, I recognize the command to men and believe that a marriage requires that a husband love his wife as Christ loves the church.

But that is reading HIS mail.  I know what to look for, but in my search to grow myself, I read my own mail;  thus, most of my writing on marriage and love relationships is written from a woman's perspective, toward a woman's "mail."

I feel absolutely NO obligation (zero) to instruct men.  I'm not a man, I don't face their challenges.  It's not my mail.

•

Yesterday, gasoline was $4.08 9/10.  So I bought 2 gallons of milk and got a coupon good for $.10 off each gallon of gas.

The question was:  Do I wait until Friday to fill up (after I've used a little more gas and buy more with the coupon?  Or buy it on Thursday, knowing what the price was then?

Buy a little less now?  Or risk the price going up?

So I filled up yesterday and today gas is $4.19.

I "won" $0.11 a gallon!  Over a dollar!  Okay...maybe not so much.  But maybe it's the thrill of the chase.

•

An official week of Weight Watchers has gone by.

1.2 pounds lost.

This week:

I bought a bike.  Then a padded seat. I think the odometer on the bike is set wrong, since mapmyrun.com says I rode 3.1 miles and the odometer says 4.9.

Tuesday:  I started a "no-poo" experiment (went shampoo free to see how it goes).

Started reading "Thin Within".  So far the only thing new to me is the concept of not "losing" weight (the idea being that if you "lose" something you hope to find it again).  They refer to "releasing" weight. I think I like that.

1.2 pounds "released".