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A couple of days were an exercise no-go.  Shoot one day was a "I-don't-want-to-move" day - a migraine yesterday had me moving between office and bed all day, with a couple of excursions downstairs for food.  (I have an electric water-heater-pot and a coffee press - the best way to make coffee - in my office and that's where my 1/2 bath is...so unless I want food I don't have to leave my bedroom/office area.)

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I lost 3-1/4 pounds - the first loss in many weeks.

The secret?  Lower carb, higher fat - but still following Weight Watchers points.  Because of thyroid and PCOS, the needs my body needs are a little different, but I still will not lose while not restricting calories.  I went to a naturopath who did NOT give me a formula, but gave me guidelines with which to make my own formula (for those who need formulas)

- 50% of my calories from fat (with the majority coming from "healthy" fat - monounsaturated) - and the fat in eggs (while saturated) is okay so even eggs are unlimited.
- 50% of the volume on my plate coming from fresh or lightly steamed fruits and vegetables

- Take my weight in pounds and eat half that many grams of protein

- The rest of my calories in complex carbs (but never wheat or dairy)

- no wheat or dairy (but I can "cheat" with kefir and yogurt)

- lots of water...half my weight in ounces

There is no limitation on calories...the lower carb, higher protein and healthy fat makes my body burn it differently - thermogenic.  The drain yesterday may have been from the shift in my body, but I am eating enough carbs for fuel.  The fat and protein guidelines make me put the emphasis on not wasting the complex carbs on "stuff".
What I know is that this works and (knowing from the past how I do even as low as Atkins) my body feels better.

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(sigh)...Here is the list of food restrictions (allergy and otherwise)

- dairy

- peanuts (due to a mold allergy giving me asthma attacks)

- potatoes, eggplants (off the table) and limited tomatoes and green peppers; these are nightshade plants and they cause - in me (YMMV) joint pain)

- wheat

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Another new blog for me!

I set up a little blog just for recipes - most of them have a combination of low-cal, moderate carb.

MzEllen Cooks (sometimes).  (I rarely cook in the summer...my son takes over with the grill.)

And here's a recipe:  Fast and Easy Chicken in Salsa with Zucchini.

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Did this thing call "sclerology"...took photos of my eyes and told me that everything that's going on in my body - my body knows and the eyes will tell.

He told me that my iron is low and my zinc is low (how many folks think about their zinc being low...only mine is - according to blood tests that were run because of my sense of smell, which is sometimes the result of a zinc issus)

He agreed (according to my symptoms) that there's some thyroid thing going on and sold me a thyroid support supplement (which I can get online...for more money, so he gave me the better deal).

He also said that most folks who live in Western Civilization have a few other things going on in the digestive tract and told me to try (at least for a few weeks) eliminating wheat and dairy.  (Yogurt, kefir and fermented dairy is ok once in a while.)

Yesterday was a big splurge in the wheat department (think Amish-made bread, noodles and apple dumplings).  Today is wheat free, but I'm drinking the rest of my skim milk.

After that's gone, I'll switch to almond milk.

Even since starting "thyadine" a week or so ago, I feel "brighter".  We'll see how it goes for the rest of it.

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Weight Watchers isn't doing it for me.  But...the beauty of FLEX to that I can use (the tracking tools, point system, etc.) and don't worry about the rest.  I paid to go until I had the tools I needed and now I have the material.

I have PCOS, diagnosed over 20 years ago.  I also strongly suspect I have thyroid issues (low body temp, thinning hair) that is not showing up in blood tests (looking for a doctor who will treat the patient, not the number).  My fasting blood sugar is perfect, as is my blood pressure.  My cholesterol is high (212).  I'd like to lose 60-70 pounds.

Weight Watchers (as written) doesn't work.

Atkins (as written) doesn't work (I did Atkins at less than 25 grams of carb a day for 3 months and lost 4 pounds).  I'm a little OCD when it comes to logging what I eat...I use a MasterCook recipe just to put my daily eating into.  So I have a good handle on what I eat.

So...combining the two.

...continue reading →

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We spent a few nice days in Chicago with my husband's sisters.

  • We spent a day at Arlington Race Track (I'm thinking that if I get sunburned enough to see where my cross sits...that makes me a "crispy critter".

sunburned cross

  • Sunday afternoon we went to Chicago Botanical Gardens

Chicago Botanical Garden

  • Monday we wandered around the Museum of Science and Industry

Museum of Science and Industry

  • Tuesday we spent at Brookfield Zoo

Brookfield Zoo...

We had a very nice trip, but it is also nice to be home.

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Today would have been my 30th wedding anniversary.

Looking back, the way that life turned out was NOT what I had planned (although most of what I had planned was about what I didn't want...I didn't want to live in a small town my entire life and I didn't want to marry a farmer).

There are good memories and bad memories.  Some of the bad memories are really, really bad.  I choose to let go of the bad ones.  My goal is for my children to remember their dad in the best way that they can.
It was a long, weird ride.  I don't regret it.

I regret my part in making the challenges...but I don't regret doing it.

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The Afghan lawyer defending a journalist on death row in Kabul has been bombarded with death threats urging him to drop the case.

Islamic extremists repeatedly threatened to murder Afzal Nooristani after he agreed to defend Sayed Pervez Kambaksh in his high-profile appeal.

The 23-year-old student writer was sentenced to death for circulating an article about women's rights. He was tried in a closed court, and denied a defence lawyer. His case has sparked worldwide protests.

emphasis mine...yep...sounds like complementarianism..(NOT)
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The Afghan lawyer defending a journalist on death row in Kabul has been bombarded with death threats urging him to drop the case.

Islamic extremists repeatedly threatened to murder Afzal Nooristani after he agreed to defend Sayed Pervez Kambaksh in his high-profile appeal.

The 23-year-old student writer was sentenced to death for circulating an article about women's rights. He was tried in a closed court, and denied a defence lawyer. His case has sparked worldwide protests. (emphasis mine)

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I'm sitting here listening to the "noon whistle" - every first Friday of every month of the spring and summer months, the tornado siren goes off for two minutes.  "This is a test, this is only a test."  No matter where you are in the city, you can hear the siren.

A couple of years ago I had the pleasure of working with a very cool student who was born in Bosnia.  (He has since passed the exam and become a US citizen...that was a wonderful day)

He remembers the air raid sirens.  He remembers hearing the sirens and hiding...and then hearing (and feeling) the bombs.

When he came to the States...he'd hear a siren and panic.  Fire engines, ambulances...all causes for great alarm.

Every single siren was a cause for panic.

I see that out there - in the Calvinims vs. Arminianism deal...comp vs. egal...Protestant vs. Roman Catholic...Mormon, Islam, yada, yada...

If, in everything we read, we read it through the lenses of what is worst in our own past, we will think the worst of everybody else out there.

If we read articles, blog, books...with the lenses of our own abuse (whether we were the victims or perpetrators), we are more likely to see abuse.

When I read an article about cessationism,  I read it through the lenses of a person who believes she has had brushes with the prophetic.  It is hard for me to comprehend a "silent" God.

When I see women out there who have been open about their past with controlling, neglectful or abusive (or any combination of the three sins) reading blogs and articles and seeing only the possibility of abuse, I wonder how much of what they see is the article and how much is the the set of lenses they are looking through.

I have my own set of lenses.  I can see neglect (where none is there).  I can see a husband with a skewed sense of priorities (when I may be wrong, the priorities may be shared).  I can see a person who does not care about one thing (when they really only have different priorities than I do).

I can dread doing one act because I fear what the next step might be...even when I know in my brain that is not the case.
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The "D" I know now...when he hears that "noon whistle" - no matter where he is, he runs outdoors and stands, eyes closed.  Just listening to the whistle.

He hears the fire truck and tells everybody around him, "do you hear that?  They're going to help somebody."

He's learning not to use his "Bosnian" lenses.

He's getting over his past.
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Perhaps the  healing starts when we learn that the lenses of the past can sometimes keep us from seeing clearly.

Perhaps the healing begins when we stop automatically fearing the worst and start expecting the best.